I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize