I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
