apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
