I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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