Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
