We're like a lot better than the average bears
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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