Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
