Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
