I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
