So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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