i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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