But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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