i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
