You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
