Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
