Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
