I'm eating all of the evidence.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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