She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
