He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
