This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
