What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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