Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
