I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize