direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
