I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
