Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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