what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
