He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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