That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
