What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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