weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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