he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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