so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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