For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
