My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
