I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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