BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
