you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
