On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
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