I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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