It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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