I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
