when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I think I died a long time ago.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
