So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
