Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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