PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
