Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
