She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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