Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
