in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
